Adoption, My Story

Village Mindset

Village Mindset…

In looking into adoption, I’ve combed through many books, blogs, and internet sites. One term that’s come up repeatedly is Kinship Care (formal or informal). Kinship care refers to the care of children by relatives or close family friends (often referred to as fictive kin) for children who must be removed from their birth parents. Immediately my mind thinks of that old adage, ‘It takes a village to raise a child.’ As I’ve raised my own children, I have often thought about this saying. In our current society it can seem like we don’t often see this village mindset in action. We so often feel like we have to independently go at it alone and in so doing miss the blessing of a community.

My Own Village…

When I first married, we moved to a town where we had no family in order for my husband to attend grad school. He did have a few friends from his childhood (fictive kin), but I had no one. I eventually made friends and found my community. It was life-giving to have others to ‘do life’ with. After the birth of our first child, I again found myself needing more community – a bigger village. Over the years more and more of our family members have moved to town and I’ve discovered how much of a ‘village’ I had still been missing. The help and support I’ve received from our family (blood and fictive) these past years has been priceless. Sure, I could’ve done it on my own, but the outcome would have been very different and much more difficult.

Receiving my Own…

Accepting help and encouragement from ‘my village’ has set me on a trajectory of emotional, spiritual, and personal health. It’s bolstered my energy, peace, and love. I’ve learned how to give because of the ways I’ve been given to. Being raised in and raising kids in a village is amazing and awesome. Not only is it good for my kids, but it’s good for me too. I’m so thankful for the communities and families that model the village mindset of supporting those around them. I guess one could say, ‘It takes a village to raise a parent,’ too.

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