A year! I can’t believe it’s been a year since we were first approved to adopt. It’s gone by so fast, but when I look back I see how much has happened. In the past year we’ve had two meetings with potential birth parents and been presented with a few other far-off matches. Sadly, none of these potential matches came to be. We did have one baby in our home for a few days, but acted more as Cradle Care for a deciding birth mother than actual prospective adoptive parents.
When our agency case worker reached out to us about updating/renewing our home study for another year I was a bit sad. I had so hoped that we would have a quick match and be on our way to an adoption court hearing by this time. Of course, I assume that most people who go down this road hope for a quick match with a baby in their home to love and cherish. Even knowing that adoption usually takes multiple years, I still wanted to be the anomaly that got matched super quick! I thought that would happen in June, then I wondered if it’d happen in August – both months when we had legitimate birth parent meetings. But alas, there were not the children for our family.
So, we find ourselves going through the steps to become home study approved again. So far we’ve had to do our physicals again, we’ve filled out our criminal background checks and had them notarized, we’ve be re-fingerprinted, and updated our financial summary. This last one was a bit of an eye-opener for me. It really made me see the reality of all the financial changes that occurred in our life this past year with both my work and my husband’s.
Not only did the COVID pandemic affect my work, causing me to quickly learn how to teach voice lessons online, but it also caused multiple speaking engagements for my husband to be canceled. With the slow down of life, we enjoyed a lot of time together as a family and even made some great headway on home projects. But even with what already seemed like a lot of change, God had something else in mind.
God began speaking to my husband, Putty, about a possible job change. The trouble was that we didn’t know what that change would be. We just felt like a shift was coming. After a lot of prayer and contemplation, as well as reaching out to some trusted individuals outside of his workplace, we knew we had to take the next step in regards to his work, even if we didn’t understand all the details. At the end of May we decided to talk with his employers, who are our friends and partners in ministry, about what we were feeling God was asking us to do next. The same day Putty had this conversation with his employers was the same day we had the first baby in our home.
It seemed so strange that we would have these two big life changes begin their respective journeys on the same day! What was God doing? So much was unknown and we couldn’t, in our own minds, work out what was going on. But, we trusted God and we said, ‘Yes’ to both the next step in his job and our family.
Over the next few months we took an even greater amount of time to pray and think about the next steps in our lives. Sadly, the adoption journey didn’t continue with this first baby because that child went back to stay with the birth mother (a wonderful decision!). It wasn’t stability in Putty’s job either because at this point we didn’t know if God was calling us to stay or go! We had so many things we were weighing very seriously and we’re so grateful for our work family that gave us time, conversation and additional prayer to work through what we felt was next.
In August we had a meeting with the executive team at Putty’s workplace to share what we felt like the Lord was calling us to next, but again, we didn’t have a lot of details. They would also be sharing with us their thoughts on the matter. We were thankful to have a team with us to support us as we continued to listen carefully in this important life decision. We still didn’t know what God was telling us to do exactly, but we knew for sure that God was saying it was time for Putty to have a change in his current workplace employment and be ready for the next step. We didn’t know if that meant staying in our current home town or moving away.
During this same week, the one with the very important work conversation, we had a meeting schedule with a set of birth parents! Was this really happening again? Was our big work decision lining up with a big family decision again? Apparently things come in pairs! Haha. Anyway, we met with the parents and knew they wanted to have contact with the baby as it grew – as many birth parents do now. The problem is that we had no idea where we were going to be in the future! As wonderful as these parents were, we didn’t feel a strong go-ahead to match with them and so we bowed out of that match and continued to wait.
When I say that waiting marked our COVID season, I’m not kidding. We waited for a baby match. We waited for job clarity. We waited for our society to open back up. We waited and waited on everything it seemed. God was growing peace in the waiting for us.
Eventually, Putty’s job situation got some clarity. God opened up a new work idea that we hadn’t considered at first. It was through the act of teaming with his workplace, friends and family outside of work, and other advisors that a really neat and workable next step came to be! Putty would shift his primary focus to starting something new, focused on developing the ministries and ideas that God has asked him to spearhead. He is still involved with our church of course, preaching and ministering, but his leadership responsibilities have shifted from the local church to this new adventure. The change officially took place in October.
During that same month we began taking the steps to update our adoption home study so we could be approved to adopt for the following year. Now at the beginning of December we have completed everything except the last home visit. That had to be postponed due to us being exposed to COVID. Next week we have a home visit and we fully expect things to move along smoothly. I am excited to have this update completed and begin the next leg of the journey!
So, our next steps in our adoption process are to wait once more. We continue to share about our journey and our desire to adopt because we value the prayers and support from everyone. We also ask that you keep us in mind if you hear about a birth mother (in any state) who is looking to make an adoption plan. My greatest desire is that through this process we can really help a mother and child who needs this option. God has placed this adoption on my heart since I was a child. The process is different than I realized it would be, but it’s a good one. God is growing me exponentially and I know that will continue even after we finalize adoption.
Please continue to pray with us that God will bring our adoption match to us and that we can be a blessing to a baby and birth mother in all this. We pray that we will continue to listen carefully for God’s leading and be well-directed by Him. For now I dream, but one day my dream will be reality. I am so thankful, hopeful, and excited. I pray that God identifies the dreams in your hearts too and that He brings them to reality in your life.
2 thoughts on “Adoption and Job Update December 2020”
It does seem hard to believe it has been a year already! I am glad you are re-upping your application. Didn’t know you had to renew every year! Dad and I will be praying you will not need to renew next December, but will be loving and nurturing your new family addition!
Thanks Mom! This is my prayer too. I’m excited for this next addition to our family.